Breathe Life Back In (Day 1 Living Ageless)

Welcome to How to Live Ageless. This is a special mini series here on the show. Our regular episodes are coming back. We're going to have season five kicking off in December. But to celebrate my birthday month? Oh yeah, these five days are all about living age loosely. And as part of this event, I'm giving you a couple things. First, these five special episodes, plus an exclusive recipe book filled with all these yummy, yummy delicious recipes made with age defying ingredients. And we'll be talking more about what that means, and you'll be entered to win a giveaway prize from Anne Marie Skincare, which is, by the way, the only line of products I've used on my skin for the past nearly a decade. But you got to be signed up to get all the goods. It's free, so if you haven't already, please go to ShesGotPower.com/ageless. And sign up, and you can do that up until November 19th, 2021.

Now I'm using the word ageless. Please don't misunderstand I love my age. I have never been happier than in my forties. I look forward to my fifties, so this is not about hiding from our age or having a problem with getting older.

I like this idea of age lawlessness because it transcends appearance. I mean, appearance might be part of it, but youthful in spirit. It's so much more than that. And agelessness also isn't exactly about health or nutrition, although that's also part of it, for sure. The best word that I've been able to come up with to describe ageless is glow radiates a glow that we have as children bubbling over with ideas and enthusiasm and wonder before the world kind of beat us down.

You know, it's who we were before. We were cynical, before we were exhausted. It's who we really are inside. So over the next five days, we're going to take steps together to get back to that place.

I could not pull off this free event with all of these goodies without the support of our partner, our collaborator, Anne Marie Skincare. And we're entering all of you who sign up into a giveaway for their natural, wild crafted skincare products or just want to tell you about that real quick. Three winners will receive a full size aloe herb cleanser and anti-aging facial oil, which is my personal favorite, especially right now in the cooler, drier weather. I use that stuff every day. And five winners are going to get Anne Marie's hydration and exfoliation bundle, so make sure that you're all registered at ShesGotPower.com/ageless.

You know, I was getting very old in my thirties. I was miserable. I was bogged down. I was looking in the mirror. I remember looking in the mirror and seeing this very old weathered face looking back at me. And these days, hey, my skin looks great. I've been doing things that I love again. I'm able to like. I just notice I'm able to handle things. I'm able to handle anything and everything that comes at me. My cup is no longer overflowing with other people's stuff. And I feel I honestly feel like I have reversed aged like 20 years.

Here's what happened. I got divorced. OK, I'm not saying that you have to get divorced to feel youthful, but had a thing. What is it? What has it been about divorce that made me start feeling 20 years younger? So I've been really considering that. I mean, there were a number of very concrete reasons that I needed to get divorced. I certainly did not do it to feel younger. In fact, it was a terrifying process to go through. But by getting divorced, I'll tell you what I found. And I think that you can go out and find it regardless of your marital status.

I found space.

This week we're going to talk about nutrition, we're going to talk about movement and sleep and taking care of your skin and how to lower all cause mortality rate, but none of that matters if you are swimming up to your eyeballs and obligations and, you know, putting out fires for everyone and everything around you. If you're drowning in a double or triple booked calendar, and if you never have a moment to yourself from the time you wake up until the time you go to bed every day, you feel like you're running a race and you are constantly behind.

If that's you, no amount of organic kale is going to make a difference. And I know this because I've been working as a coach for women for almost 13 years and I see women come alive. It is the best. I see them initially come through my door, my virtual front door feeling blah half-dead inside, and I'll ask, you know, “Hey, what do you like to do for fun?” And they look at me like, I'm nuts, and they’re like, “Fun? What's fun?”

Or I'll ask how they like to be creative, what their hobbies are? Radio silence like no answer. And then a couple of months later, they're leaving with a spring in their step. You know, they have energy, they have ideas, they're doing things that they love again. I remember one of my clients saying over and over, I feel like a new person. I feel like a new person. That's what we're going for this week.

But to make it happen in your life requires a commitment not to just add things to your to do list. You know, like, okay, I have to go do this yoga class because exercise is good for me. And Oh, Michelle gave me this recipe books. And now I got to go to Whole Foods and I got to cook five of these recipes. And then I'll be ageless. No, like, that's not it, right? You need space.

You need some space to breathe. And I don't know if it's like the physical space that you need too many people around you all the time could be. Maybe you need mental space like fewer projects to keep track of fewer plates spinning. Maybe. And I'm actually I'm willing to bet this is true for you and true for all of us. You need some space in your calendar, right? You need fewer obligations. You need time in your life. That is actually just empty. Unscheduled. Just to do whatever you want or do nothing at all and just see what unfolds.

I was recently listening to an episode. I don't know if you listen to Glennon Doyle's podcast, but she had an episode about creativity, chemistry and claiming your joy. I think that was actually the title of the episode, and the metaphor for joy was fire. And that for fire to burn, it needs air. Like, we need that air. We need that space, that fire, that's our glow. And that is the number one secret I have found to living agelessly was that my clients, they come alive just by virtue of committing to working together. They are setting aside time and space for themselves.

And, you know, sometimes dietary changes really help, and sometimes they kick off a new exercise routine or reengage with an old hobby they love. But blah blah blah, right? It's like the main thing is they give themselves space to explore. I remember being a kid and just kind of staring out the window. I guess, like, you know, this was before the internet, I would have been staring at a screen, but now I was just staring out the window of my bedroom. I grew up in central New Jersey and a pretty nondescript place. I was too young to have a car, no video games. I wasn't even allowed to have a TV or phone in my room are the worst. And I just be kind of zoning out ideas floating around in my head. These days you’ve got a schedule in those ten minutes with like your Headspace meditation app if you're going to let your mind relax or even try to let your mind relax. We do not have enough downtime, and if we do, it's like, Oh, better, see what's on Netflix or better scroll Instagram. It's like we fill it right up.

So my challenge for you today is to take action in creating space for yourself. Maybe write down on a Post-it note or in your plan or just write down space. That's the word of the day, and I, when you consider doing this in three ways.

So first, think about your physical space. Maybe you need to kick everybody out of your house for a couple of hours. Or maybe it means that your living space needs to be decluttered. Maybe there is a physical space issue at work. Let's say you're in a cubicle and you know you need to get outside to get yourself in nature this week. Give yourself physical space to breathe. OK.

The next area is more of that mental emotional space. I want you to say no to something. Cross it off your to do list. Get it off your plate. And the bigger and scarier, the better. Let me tell you. Saying no to my marriage was very, very scary. But now I don't spend my days putting out fires, navigating arguments, crying endless tears. I have so much space back, it's almost like I got another, you know, 20 hours in my day.

Another thing and this is a smaller thing, but it was still pretty significant. I recently said no to my son joining a travel baseball team. I said, you know, you already have a baseball team. And then you have, like umpteen other activities that you're involved with, by the way, you know, why do we need to drive an hour away to play more baseball? He's only 10. I think everybody needs more space. This includes our kids because we're teaching them. We're teaching them to fill up every second of their day. So we said no to the travel baseball. I want you to say no to something this week, even if you think you can't, especially if you think you can't, because you know the world is probably going to collapse without you. Well, sit back and watch it fall. That's the name of the game.

And finally, this is related, but you need space on your calendar, like reclaiming my time, reclaiming my time. For me, that looks like blocking out my calendar before 11 a.m. and all day on Mondays. Like, nobody is going to be booking anything with me during those times. I need that time. And there are days that as a busy entrepreneur, I barely have time to shower or to eat lunch. So guess what? I block time on my calendar for those things too, and it just says shower or eat lunch. That's how you can protect your time, too. And I need you to do this. I need you to clear some space on your calendar, cancel something, decline that meeting, and even better, clear your evenings. Give yourself a few nights a week to be home with zero plans, zero obligations. I want you to breathe again. Breath some life back into yourself. Tomorrow, I'll be back to talk about my favorite thing, food! I’ll see you then.

How to live ageless is a free event running from November 15th to the 19th. If you've enjoyed listening, please take two minutes to leave a podcast review on Apple Podcasts. Your review will earn you 10 extra entries into our How to Live Ageless Anne-Marie Skincare Giveaway, directions are at ShesGotPower.com/ageless.